Kindness On Her Tongue

Communication in a Godly way is the foundation of having a healthy marriage. It is also the best way to solve conflicts when they arise in your marriage and since no marriage is void of conflict, we need to learn how to handle it head-on. When there is conflict, we are not called to run and hide, nor are we called to attack the other person with accusations. So how do we find that beautiful middle ground where we can talk about things openly, honestly, and respectfully? How can we handle arguments and conflict in a way that honors God, especially when emotions can run very high? She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. Proverbs 31:26. The first thing we need to focus on is getting rid of any biblical thoughts as soon as they enter our brain. Such thoughts can be, What’s the point, he will never change, There is no way to fix this, or I will have things my way whether he likes it or not. Most of the time we don’t even realize these thoughts creep into our minds because we hear them so much from society. We see it on TV shows, in communication with friends and co-workers, and everywhere we turn our heads. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and [e]acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2. Instead of running away from conflict or trying to avoid it, we should change the way that we think about the situation.

It is important to acknowledge how powerful negative thoughts can be and how they can negatively impact our emotions. Having the right thoughts on the other hand can make conflict resolution much more manageable. With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love Ephesians 4:2. Humility is important when solving conflict because when you put your husband’s needs above your own, it makes you focus on his needs and his point of view. If you humble yourself and do not seek your own way in whatever battle you and your husband are facing, God will be glorified. In the meantime pray for God to remove this battle from your marriage. We should also approach these situations with gentleness which means having strength under control. We are to have our emotions under control at all times. Sometimes as women, we try to make things bigger and have a bigger reaction to them to be noticed by our husbands. In general, they are taller and stronger than us, which causes us to act bigger and taller than them in other ways. Instead, we should, increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might, for the attaining of all perseverance and patience; joyously giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified us to share in the inheritance of the saints in light. Colossians 1:11-12.