Stressed Out?!

Stress can sneak into our marriage at any time, and usually, when it rains, it pours. So how can we handle stress in a way that is honoring to God? How can we learn to deal with stress without making the problem worse? Try not to fix the problem, but have empathy for what your spouse is feeling. Ask your spouse to share with you about his stress. Sometimes we just need someone to listen and provide a shoulder to cry on, rather than have someone fix our issues. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6. Furthermore you can pray for and with your spouse. Praying together out loud makes us more vulnerable to one another, and we can therefore minister to one another better.

When your spouse is feeling stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed, he may act out in less-than-ideal ways. Some ways that people respond to stress are to complain or protest. Other people become angry, numb, or just shut down and shut people out. However your spouse is responding to stress, don’t take it personally. We can always point our spouse back to Jesus because he is our perfect example of how to handle every situation. He tells us to Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4. But how did Jesus act when he was under a lot of stress, he frequently would retreat by himself and pray to his father. We know after His baptism Jesus entered the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. There, He prayed and fasted for 40 days and nights (see Matthew 4, Mark 1, Luke 4), which helped contribute to His success over temptation. Likewise, when we face demanding seasons, prayer can help us face and meet the challenge. Jesus prayed so intensely in the garden of Gethsemane before he was taken to stand trial, in Luke 22:40-44, that he sweats blood. We also see that Jesus likes to be alone during difficult situations, so if your spouse just needs some alone time, let him have it. Just encourage prayer for him during that time.

Most of all Jesus tells us not to worry about the future. We have very limited control over what the future holds for us. So instead of being fearful, we are to be in prayer. Therefore, do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” Matthew 6:34. God already knows what we need before we even ask, so tell him what’s on your heart and he will give you his peace.